When someone you know is struggling: what can you do?
You don't need all the answers to help someone who's having a hard time. How to start the conversation, listen, and help them find support.
Sometimes, you notice that someone you know does not seem like themselves. They may have become quieter, more withdrawn or easily upset. They may be struggling with work, studies, relationships or something happening in their personal life. You may not know exactly what is wrong, but you may sense that they are finding things difficult.
In such moments, you do not need to have all the answers. You do not need to become their counsellor. Sometimes, the most helpful thing you can do is simply let them know that you have noticed and that you are there.
Start with listening
A simple question such as “Are you okay?” or “Do you want to talk about what’s happening?” can open the door to a conversation. If they choose to talk, try to listen without immediately judging, interrupting or trying to solve the problem.
People do not always need advice straight away. Sometimes they need to feel heard and understood. You can acknowledge what they are feeling without pretending to have a solution for everything.
If their difficulties continue, become more intense or start affecting their everyday life, gently encourage them to speak with a qualified mental-health professional. Offering to help them find appropriate support can make taking that first step feel easier.
You do not have to fix everything
Supporting someone does not mean taking responsibility for their entire wellbeing. You can care about someone while also maintaining your own boundaries and seeking support for yourself when needed.
If someone tells you that they may seriously hurt themselves or someone else, it is important to take them seriously. Do not dismiss the statement or promise to keep it secret. Seek urgent professional or emergency help and involve an appropriate trusted person when necessary to help keep them safe.
In India, you can call the national helpline Tele-MANAS at 14416, free and at any time. If someone is in immediate danger, call 112.
Mental-health support does not always begin in a counselling room. Sometimes it begins with one person asking another, “Are you okay?” — and staying long enough to listen.
At RKS Mental Health & Wellness Center, we believe that compassionate support can begin with something as simple as noticing, listening and helping someone find the right support.
This article is general information, not medical advice. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call the national helpline Tele-MANAS at 14416.
